I'd like a side of Understanding, please.

It's been a while since I last posted. I can say that I feel like I'm running in circles, unable to break free from my life to do more than gasp for air before sinking back beneath the surface of cares and demands my life has become. I find that I am once more short on funds while retaining a largess of bills to pay. Sixty hours a week between two jobs simply isn't enough. (To be completely honest, both of these jobs aren't much above minimum wage, so that's not surprising.) However, to gripe about my finances isn't the real reason I have surfaced once more.

The real topic is on why I don't understand women, and why I don't think I ever will. That might offend some people. If you read further, perhaps you could explain to me why women do what they do. I can't come up with a single good reason on my own.

I've gone over four months without mentioning engineering girl. The last time I had made mention of her, things couldn't have gotten much worse between friends. Well, she and I are no longer friends at this point. This time, I didn't place the final straw upon the proverbial camel's back. No, I continued to avoid her as much as I could. It's kind of hard, since I unintentionally chained myself to her by agreeing to work on a "capstone" project, also known as a senior project, with her as a member of that group.

I've been walking on eggshells around her, since anything I say to her is instant cause for her temper to flare up and become argumentative. It hasn't been much fun working beside her. She even called an "emergency" meeting for our group just to attack me for things she thought I did wrong. I can't fail to mention that we are now working on our third idea for a senior project because she broke the first two.

I, however, did not call her to task for this, and at the moment, I regret not doing so. She has cost our group upwards of three hundred dollars in scrapped parts. She has been the most vocal voice against me, even though I am probably her better as an engineer. (I can say this with a straight face and know that I do not boast, but I won't give those reasons now.) As a matter of fact, our group consists of the four out of top ten engineering students in the program. And while she is not among the top ten, she isn't a slouch either. (I couldn't bear to work with someone who wasn't capable and would have moved to keep them out of the group.)

For the reasons above, that alone should have been enough to cause me to be less than pleased with her presence in my life. Yet there are other reasons. Now that I am no longer under the glamour of her attention, I can see that she uses the fact that she is female to the fullest advantage. Such as wheedling parts from one engineering student, demanding assistance from a math student for a her attention, or taking full advantage of any situation regardless of the morality or ethics that might be involved in that situation.

To give an example of her lack of scruples, recently the class was assigned a hand in problem based on the text book. Both she and I are in the same math class, and for different reasons, don't own the textbook. She borrowed a math textbook from the aforementioned math student. I could see stars in the poor boy's eyes as she asked him to borrow it with that sweet smile aimed fully at him.

As I said, I knew she didn't own a textbook, and when she walked into the next class we had together, I asked her if she had made copies of the textbook she had borrowed. She became indignant and claimed that she had paid for the text book in front of my fellow engineering students. I was surprised by the violence of her reaction, and apologized immediately for my assumption.

The next class I had that day, I shared with the same math student. I asked to borrow his book to make copies of the assignment. He told me that he couldn't because the girl in class that I was friends with had it. I realized at that moment that she had lied to me. I haven't made any mention to her about my discovery. Nor have I mentioned it to anyone else except for those who witnessed her reaction to me.

I guess what I am saying is that she has no honor, and is a liar to boot. I don't understand why she does what she does. I can see reasons for lying, to protect others who might get physically hurt if the truth were told, to explain to a child that the moon really is made out of green cheese, or etc. Why lie about the ownership of a book?

I can see how easily people immediately turn to her honeyed sweetness and seemingly ingenuousness nature. She has told me once that she was the top salesperson at a computer store she worked at, and I begin to understand how she managed to attain that crown. Probably what eats at me the most is that people will believe her and based on her facade, people around her will help her to excel where ever she goes. Sometimes, justice isn't dealt to those who deserve it and that bothers me.

I guess I'll have to chalk this experience as another lesson learned. For now, I will have to resign myself to counting the days until this semester ends. At which time, I no longer have to deal with such an odious creature. Now, that plan is a real reason to look forward to an end of a semester.