Where do you call home?

Home is where the heart is.

Such a warm sentiment that spurs one to think of happy places. I've been conteplating these words of wisdom for several days now, and to be honest, I don't know where my heart is. Well, trying not to be funny, yes, I know where my heart is (in my body, silly! Ok, you can laugh now. Guess I didn't fail there.). I mean to say that I don't know where I have placed that shelter I run to when I am in need of peace. My rock in the storms of life, so to speak. The place I am rooted to when troubles find me. The place that I can go to for shelter and tell the world that this, this ineffable place, is me.

Lately, when I have been discouraged, I go to sleep. I find my haven in luxuriating in sleeping for ten hours or more. The disadvantage to this is that I can't always afford the luxury of sleep. There aren't enough waking hours to do my work as it is. I have been thinking about where can I find that "place" that allows me to cope (yes, merely cope) with my daily struggles.

I won't accept the worn cliche of putting my heart's peace with someone special. They may not have the time to assist me when I am in my time of need. Worse yet, they might betray my trust in them. Rare indeed is the friend that I can trust without reserve. In my two plus decades, I have found only two such in the thousands of people I have met in my lifetime so far. Even they cannot be there for me at all times. And we won't even discuss family members.

The crux of my dilemna is finding that reliable "place" to relocate my inner peace that will allow me to take in my troubles with a calmer outlook. This "place" cannot reside in one person and I need to be able to access it at any time, anywhere I may be. I don't even know where to begin looking for such a "place".