It all ends with a mile. (Reaching out to a shy person)

Lately, I've been receiving a lot of views from people all over the world visiting my blog with a common theme. How to communicate with a shy person. I am often left in wonder by these visits.

I wonder if these people whom look to insert themselves into a shy person's life do so without malice or ill intent. I wonder if they understand that each individual is a sensitive human being that has erected this shyness as a defense against an uncaring world and universe. I wonder if these are truly genuine people who are willing to put forth the time and effort to really commune with such intractable people, all of them, shy individuals. Something to note carefully, that each shy person is an individual.

I'm sorry to point out that there is no all encompassing guide or map that opens the doors to their quiet persona. I hope that those who visit here understand that. That's not to say that there are some keys that may work. I offer them to everyone because each and every single individual on this earth needs and wants positive attention from others whether they agree or deny that fact.

I own a shirt, a very old one, that has several words on it, all but one crossed out. It goes something like this: Black, White, Yellow, Red, Brown, Human. Embracing that concept is the first key.

However, that concept alone does not open doors to these individuals. As hokey as it sounds, a Christian concept that is often forgotten is the next key. Love your neighbor. It's hard to love individuals whose personalities aren't immediately accessible. Especially when they are children. That quiet, well behaved, attention-avoiding child is the first one to be ignored. So, to put it succinctly, you have to be willing to notice the ones who don't put themselves forward, or first for that matter.

Yet, noticing them also doesn't ensure that they will be willing to be open to you. Kindness is another key. Recognizing that harsh words surely slam the defensive shell around these sensitive souls faster than it takes to say "No," is a necessary ability. Compassion goes hand in hand with kindness.

Of course, you can't show kindness and compassion without engaging them. Even though you're not aware of it, they are quite aware of you and hoping that you will engage them. But how do you do that if words only make them act more shyly? It should be obvious to everyone. It's extremely universal too.

Do you know what that is? It's a honest and genuine smile.