Time to disappear off the face of the earth

I will be taking a short hiatus from blogging starting today and going on until the weekend before thanksgiving. My class workload has attained critcial mass and this will assorb any free time I have for the next couple of weeks, thereby interfering with my ability to be blogging much. (Shows where my priorites are, my workload interfering with my blogging.) So in the interim, I leave you with this parting quandry to tide you over until I regain some control over my course workload. (I'll still try to read some blogs, but writing will have to wait.)

Is it within the human nature to always want more than they have? Do we have some innate drive that has us look at the things we have and say, "It's just not enough?" I don't mean just material things either. I'm talking about emotional and physical desires too.

To put it another way, why are we never satisfied with what we have? For instance, you're dating someone that is interesting, engaging, and funny. However, something about this person doesn't fit into your "ideal" image of what you think your "one and only" should be. Is the purpose of breaking up a relationship really about finding someone better? Someone you can't get enough of, wanting to be in contact with them even when you're apart? And to draw another question out of this topic, better for whom?

I find myself at a crossroads. I am contemplating the thought of doing something I have eschewed my entire life: Breaking up another's relationship so that I can have someone to relate to and be with. And to care for and not get enough of.

Would it be so bad to have that silly grin you wear everywhere you go because you have this extreme high? Or trying hard to walk without seeing if you can leap, dance or fly? To talk the whole night long, even though we have to be somewhere else in the morning? I don't think it would be so bad. I may be a bit biased though.

I won't go into the reasons for why I consider myself a better candidate than the person this female I am interested is currently involved with. Always in the past, I have avoided this situation because of all the problems that often occur in breaking someone out of their relationship with another person. And yet, as the song by Moving Pictures goes, What about me? It isn't fair! I've had enough, now I want my share! Can't you see? ... I'm feeling cold and alone. I guess I'm lucky, I smile a lot but sometimes I wish for more than I've got.

So I am thinking about doing something I find somewhat vile and repulsive. Something that is fraught with worry, stress and frustration. Along with the questions about this girl's intentions are the concerns of whether she might leave me for someone "better" some day in the future. All the risk for a possible reward of finding that someone special. Yet, what about me? I have been lonely for too long. And sometimes, I wish for more than what I've got.